Category Archives: College Football

USC-San Jose State continued…

3rd Quarter

13:45- McKnight weaves through the defense for a long touchdown run.  35-3 USC.  He talked about emerging as the feature back during the offseason and is well on his way with 135 yards and 2 touchdowns so far.

12:55- My mind is starting to wander from the game.  San Jose State cannot move the ball on offense.  Should I get Mexican or Chinese for dinner?

12:08- San Jose State stuffed for a 4-yard loss.  USC has 11 tackles for a loss already.  Definitely going to go with Mexican tonight…

11:32- Spartans facing 3rd and long.  This is becoming a familiar refrain.  USC almost intercepts the pass twice.  4th down.

Expecting big things out of this return…

11:17- Punted out of bounds at the 14.  I never said I was Nostradamus.  Or Negrodamus.

Oklahoma State up 17-7.  Can’t decide whether I would rather see Megan Fox in a bikini or an SEC school lose.

Okay, I’d rather see Georgia lose…

10:45- Petros Papadakis has said “conservative” about 43 times this game.  Hopefully Carroll lets Barkley sling it around a bit before the Ohio State game.

The roommates are getting antsy and want to swim.  I’ll be joining them after this drive.

8:46- USC down to the 5-yard line after a Brice Butler catch.  I’d like to see Barkley throw on this next play.  Let him show off the arm…

Even Uncle Rico doesnt have Barkleys arm strength

Even Uncle Rico doesn't have Barkley's arm strength

8:28- Barkley completes the first touchdown of his USC career.  42-3.  I’ll set the over/under for career touchdowns at 94 (in only three years).  Any takers?

Time to swim.  Sorry ladies, there won’t be any pictures.


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USC-San Jose State

(Sort of) live blogging from the USC-San Jose State game.  Viewed from the comfort of my blisteringly hot apartment.

There won’t be any posts from the first quarter because I didn’t have my computer, but it wasn’t pretty.  San Jose State leads the game 3-0.  A quick observation from the first quarter:  San Jose State players wear garbage bags on their heads when on the sideline.  Their athletic budget must have been cut during the summer.

Anyways, on to the second quarter…

10:51- Stafon Johnson runs it up the middle from 5 yards out.  7-3 USC.  Johnson has always been my favorite of the USC stable of backs.  I will undoubtedly draft him three rounds too early in fantasy football next year.

With the first pick in the draft...

With the first pick in the draft...

Switched over to the Georgia-Okie State game.  A Cowboys coach is rubbing his belly on the sidelines.  I switch back to the USC game.

9:31- Patrick Perry picks up a first down on third-and-short.  He has quick feet and shifty hips (I’ve been reading a lot of Mel Kiper Jr. recently…)

8:23- My buddy is strumming his guitar during the game.  What’s up with that?

7:43- USC forces a fumble.  The band starts up again.  If you’re ever on campus go to a band practice.  The director sounds like Steinbrenner on Seinfeld.  It’s uncanny.



6:59- Barkley fakes a handoff and throws to an open Damian Williams.  Hopefully the new coordinator starts to trust Barkley a bit.

6:20- Damian Williams takes a screen down to the 6.  He’s the best receiver in the country not named Dez Bryant.

Damian Williams

Damian Williams

5:15- Johnson scores on another short run.  14-3 USC.  I’ll be taking him 5 rounds too early now.

Matt Millen is a commentator for ABC now.  I expect the ABC network to fold within the hour.

4:48- Johnson mumbles something unitelligible into the camera.  His ascent up my draft board is stalling.

4:02- 3rd-and-11 for San Jose State.  Not the position they want to be in.  Sacked for a 9-yard loss.

2:49- Allen Bradford finds a crease in the defense and runs it in from the 44.  21-3 USC.  The Trojans are starting to overpower San Jose State.

2:23- Spartans QB Kyle Reed has sat out the last few series.  He took a big shot in the first quarter.  The new guy, Jordan LaSecla, is probably hoping the training staff finds Reed some advil quick.

He could use some Tough Actin Tinactin too

He could use some Tough Actin' Tinactin too

0:55- 17-yard completion to Damian Williams.  He’s been wide open on every one of his receptions.

0:43- Havili hurdles a defender en route to a 7-yard gain.  He could start at tailback for a lot of programs.

1st and goal at the 10.  It’ll be interesting to see if the coaching staff puts the ball in Barkley’s hands.

0:34- Fade to Williams in the endzone.  Incomplete.  Nice throw by Barkley.

0:28- Pitch to McKnight.  He easily gets to the corner.  28-3 USC.

Halftime stats:

Matt Barkley 8/11 137 12.5 0 0
Joe McKnight 10 62 6.2 1 22
Allen Bradford 3 53 17.7 1 43
Stafon Johnson 6 27 4.5 2 9
Stanley Havili 2 10 5.0 0 7
Matt Barkley 2 -5 -2.5 0 1
Damian Williams 3 67 22.3 0 33
David Ausberry 2 37 18.5 0 27
Anthony McCoy 2 20 10.0 0 22
Stanley Havili 1 13 13.0 0 13

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Oregon Football

Loyal followers of my Blazers season prospectus (Hi Mom!) will have to wait a bit for the next update because another sport just started (or ended, depending on how you look at it).  I’m talking about college football and the mighty Ducks of Oregon.

After weeks of heated debate over what uniform combination the team should wear (I personally wanted the pink sequined jerseys with fuchsia helmets and sparkly shoes) Oregon faced off against the No. 14 Boise State Broncos in an opening-night showdown that lived up to none of the expectations.  Neither team scored a lot.  Neither team played well.  And, quite frankly (I promise that is the last time my blog will relate in any way to Stephen A. “Cheese Doodle” Smith), neither team deserved to win.

Congratulations to Boise State.  They were clearly the less bad team tonight and will walk away with one victory and one less tooth, courtesy of a right hook by Clubber Lang– I mean LaGarrette Blount.  Think that fat kid is going to talk any more trash this season?

Dont talk no trash to LaGarrette

Don't talk no trash to LaGarrette

Blount deserves to be suspended for the punch, although you could make the case that he simply took the new NCAA sportsmanship rules about taunting to an extreme.  Ridicule an opponent, get punched in the face.  Kind of like a shock collar for a dog.  Thank goodness for that contrived pre-game handshake, though.  Things could have really gotten out of hand otherwise.

One final note: Chris Peterson is a class act.  Makes losing to the Broncos a little less painful.

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